choosing kindness and 13 years of marriage

This week we celebrated our 13th wedding anniversary. It was our small group night and we hosted as usual. We shared a meal, toasts, the news about the football coach  from U of A being let go, discussion about Easter and prayer. It was not an anniversary as most would expect, but it was perfect, absolutely perfect!

As we sat together with our friends in our living room, squirmy laughter filled boys on laps and a roaming DandyDog demanding attention, I prayed these words:

Thank you Jesus for answering our prayers and using our home to be a 

gathering place, where you are honored. 

I thanked him for many other blessings, but above all I was thankful for this, as it was a result of the decision we made on a night 13 years prior.

We served communion at the end of our wedding ceremony. My dress has the purple stains down the front to prove it. It was important to share a meal with all who had gathered and years later it remains a priority. 

The years have certainly not always been easy and joy filled, but they have been solid. There are days when we  don't top the list of each other's favorite person, yearning for the next day when we will return to spot number one. Days when we are unsure what our love for one another looks like, knowing that as we choose to walk together that love will grow wings, as long as the cocoon isn't cut. Cutting a cocoon is the easiest way to free a butterfly who is in the midst of struggle, but will lead to its inability to fly. 

Today, as I look back on the 13 years of my marriage, some have tried to clip my cocoon, believing it's easiest to take the short road, where others have been steadfast in prayer, holding me close and watching, closely watching, not from a distance, loving. To those who have not tried to clip the cocoon, Thank you. You know who you are and I pray you know how thankful I am for you.

The past year of our marriage has by far been the best and I can't wait to see what year 14 brings. I am unsure we could be more satisfied with the place in life we find ourselves. For the past we are thankful and for the future we anticipate, but right now we are satisfied, so satisfied. 

There is a blog which I have shared from before, but today may be one of the best things I have read to date from an old summer camp friend, turned Hollywood Housewife: kindness in marriage. The words she shares are affirming and challenging. I have chosen kindness in my marriage and I know with much certainty that my husband has too. Do you? Will you?